So I haven’t heard anything exciting on the cambus lately but I did hear a little something at Kohl’s the other day:
Woman #1: Let’s just keep shopping for a few more mintues.
Woman #2: You go ahead, I need to find a place to sit so I can itch myself.
I wanted to follow her and take a picture but I didn’t have the stomach. She was a grizzly one.
One of the things I can view as administrator of this site is how people accessed this site. For example, if someone posts a link on Facebook and someone clicks it, I see that they came from Facebook (I don’t know WHO clicked the link, just that it was clicked, so don’t bring out the tin-foil hats…..yet….). Another section in my stats is what people searched for on Google or another search engine. Here is a screen shot of that section from yesterday:
If this was you that Googled: Cambus live sex, you are a sick, sick person.
The other day I thought of a new game that could be played either within or between sororities and fraternities. STD Bingo!
Hey, I know that STD’s are no laughing matter, but why not make it FUN?!?!
I know that a perfect Bingo chart is 5×5, but this is all I could think of.
Seriously, if you want good posts, ride the Cambus, eavesdrop, and submit the freaking story. Otherwise, this is the kind of thing you are going to get…..
At this time of year approximately 60% of women on the University of Iowa campus start wearing the following outfit: stretch pants with Uggz.
#1: You don’t stand out – everyone else is dressed exactly the same as you.
#2: If you don’t have stretch pants, don’t try to get by with just tights and Uggz. I literally just witnessed this. Tights are much more…. how do you say…… sheer……
#3: If you still opt for the tights, make sure that they are not transparent. Check your self under several light levels before you leave your apartment.
#4 If you STILL opt for the tights, wear underwear that matches the color of your tights. A thong, at leas.
#5. IF YOU STILL opt for the tights…… please shave…..
I just witnessed a see-through-tights and Uggz-wearing-unshaven-wildabeast on Burlington. Yes, it was that bad and that obvious.
Don’t get me wrong….. it was quite slut-tastic, I just don’t think her mom would be proud. Or maybe she is….
I was riding the red route and we stopped at the Pentacrest to let aboard a group full of new passengers. Two bros go to the back of the bus and begin to chat, like bros. Then comes a nerdy, graduate program geek with athletic sunglasses on. He sits down next to them.
Bro 1: I want to just throw a piece of paper at someone on the bus, wouldn’t that be cool?
Bro 2: Yeah that would be funny!
Geek : I wouldn’t advise that, there might be people like me who are crazy and might do something about it. (Trying to sound intimidating) . . . .(Not working)
Bro 1 : Well I would try to hit a girl.
Bro 2: Yeah it would be like a ice breaker. (Hi Fives commence)
Geek : Then one day you wake up skinless in a bowl of salsa.
Bro 1: At least you would taste good.
Geek : Yeah, I guess you’re right there.
Bro 2: I like salsa, with chips.
Bro 1: Yeah.
Dear Fratty McFratterton, please invest in this fine product:
What’s with the smiling banana?! Isn’t this about breast cancer? I guess sex sells, even with an ad like this.
It was my first day on the job. I was in training, in fact, this was my first day of training. It was the summer of 2007. The sky was partly cloudy, though it looked like it could rain. I got on the bus and sat in the driver’s seat. It was a little intimidating. Think about it, you are one person controlling 20,000+ lbs of metal as it travels at what can seem to a new driver as a blistering 25 mph. I sat on the bus and I drove. I wasn’t the only one though, there was another trainee doing his first day of training as well. As I pull up the IMU stop it starts to rain. Not much, just a sprinkle. My trainer tells me, “You know, we aren’t really supposed to let you guys drive when it starts to rain. But it’s light enough right now where I think you’re going to be fine.” As we pull up to Macbride hall, we hear something over the radio that affirms why this rule regarding rain and trainees was in place to begin with. Mind you we have traveled a mere one-hundred yards from when he said those words until we heard this over the radio.
Trainer- Trainer to base.
Base- Go ahead.
Trainer- We just got in an accident.
Base- What’s your location?
Trainer- Park Road Bridge
Now, this might not seem like much of a big deal. I mean lets face it. It was the kid’s first day. Maybe he hit a light pole, Maybe he took a turn too wide, or maybe even another car hit him. However, none of these were the case. When we drove by the rain had already stopped. It seemed as though that little rain cloud was destined just for him. When we drove by we saw the accident. This trainee, in an attempt to make a right hand turn onto the bridge, had managed to lose control of his bus in the rain, hop the median, and t-bone a car. He then continued forward knocking part of the bridge-railing into the water and nearly sending the bus in for good measure. When he got to the cambus office he quit immediately.
This conversation was overheard as a man and his son were getting on a football charter at Hancher:
Man: “Well you’d better get used to riding the bus son, it’s how us poor people do it.”
Classic
This was a conversation over the radio while I was driving bus one day. I don’t remember the specific routes.
Driver 1: Bus 84 to Base
Base: Go ahead.
Driver 1: Bus 84, when I hit a good sized bump beeps. As in an alarm is going of but very shortly and only if I hit a good sized bump.
Base: Okay I will see if it’s written up.
Driver 2: Base if it’s bus 84, then it’s been doing that for a long time. It’s a “door ajar” alarm from the overhead circuit breaker box that only goes off on a good sized bump.
Base: Do you know how to make it stop?
Driver 2: No, I tried tightening the door and it didn’t work then.
Driver 3: I vote we take it out back a put it out of its misery.
Base: No, we can’t do that.
Driver 1: I agree with that idea. Can we shoot it?
Driver 2: I second that. Motion agreed and seconded. Can the motion carry?
Driver 1: Yeah, I think the motion carries. We’re going to shoot it Base.
Base: No.
…So much for Democracy, and working buses.
